Friday, August 1, 2014

Red Delicious Blood

Sometimes when I am home by myself and there is nothing on the tube, boredom washes over me and I do what any other Big Brother fan would do. I reach into the back of my linen closet and carefully slide out the bucket I keep on hand for slow rainy days such as these. I then push all my furniture against the walls and carefully lay a tarp over my creamy colored carpet. Satisfied with the amount of space I've given myself to "work", I then disrobe and toss my garments as far away as I can. Now I am ready.

With excitement coursing through my veins and anticipation lighting up my eyes, I kneel down, remove the lid off the bucket, and stare into the inky crimson-ness. Blood. Deep dark thick metallic smelling blood. I should prolong what I'm about to do next, but I never was a patient person. With a giggle in my throat and eagerness pressing my lips tightly together, I plunge my hands into the bucket and swirl them around feeling the warm gummy viscous goodness in between my fingers. I then yank them out of the bucket, stand proudly and hold my arms up over my head. Blood on my hands. Blood on my hands! I look skyward as the goo slowly drips down my arms, my waist, my legs. Exhaling, I close my eyes and begin to sway to my own whispers, "Blood on my hands, blood on my hands, blood on my hands..." Let's recap, shall we?

Well well, it looks like the majority of the house is finally finding itself in a bit of a pickle (not to be confused with a pickle in a banana). With the CBS show abruptly ending before we got any definitive HOH winners, live feeders scrambled to their laptops and wondered to themselves why a tie breaker question wasn't ready and available. CBS faux pas aside, the feeds returned and revealed that Nicole and Donny are our new HOH's. *rubs bloody hands together* Oh goody! Not that I'm a fan of either, mind you. I'm just sick of the feeds sucking and the drama lacking. We need some bloody drama dammit! Where are my arguments? Where are my fights? Where are the insults flying?

OK, so the power has finally switched sides, but will Nicole and Donny take advantage of it or will they do something safe and boring and go after Valentina or Jocasta? The two meet in the Hive and are confident that together they can come up with a plan that will satisfy both of them. Donny mentions how he wants to bring Hayden into the decision making and Nicole couldn't be happier. Of course Nicole loves this idea. The notion of her having to make a decision all on her own is much too much for her to handle.

Nicole says that there was no way she could let Zach or Caleb win that HOH. Donny smiles and nods knowingly. He then says, "I hett ta say eet, but I wuz pulling fer Christine ta lose because I felt that she wuz gonna put me enn Jocasta up sahd bah sahd." Donny hints to Nicole that Christine might have to go on the block. Nicole doesn't say too much to that. Instead she stresses how there are only 9 people for them to pick from and oh my god it's so stressful. Oh my god, 4 out of 9 is like almost 50% and oh my god it's freaking out Nicole. (I hate this chick so much.) Nicole then tells Donny that they should pretend that they don't know one another's nominations.

The conversation continues with Nicole actually having the gall to comment on how some people are just sailing by in the game because they don't want to get blood on their hands. Like you, pumpkin? She says it pisses her off so much especially when people throw competitions when she's always out there fighting to win. You are a piece of work, Nicole. Wasn't it you who bitched and moaned the first time you won HOH and complained nonstop about not wanting to have to make a decision? Wasn't it you who said that you purposely didn't want to win?

Hearing all of this, Donny remarks that some people need to know what it feels like to be on the block. He again mentions Christine and says that he doesn't necessarily want her to go home, but that she might have to go up due to the shortage of possibilities.

The two part and we finally see a house beginning to panic. Off in one room, Jocasta is crying to Derrick over how she can't win a comp while in the Storage Room, Zach is grilling Nicole. Nicole repeats to Zach the whole 4 out of 9 people is almost 50% thing and how she has a reason to put him up. Zach asks, "But am I your target?" Nicole replies that he isn't and then promptly hems and haws in that annoying way of hers, "I don't know what I'm going to do yet."

Nicole then tells Zach that it's all been girls going up so far and "that's not going to work this time." Zach tells her that he knows 4 people she won't definitely put up and then Donny has 2 people he has to put up which leaves 3 people for Nicole to pick from. Zach then tells her, "Put me up." Nicole asks, "No hard feelings?" Zach replies, "No hard feelings at all."

But then the indecisive twit says, "I could put up Valencia and Jocasta." Zach says, "That's who you should put up. Then you'll definitely stay HOH." Nicole remarks (and lies) about how she and Donny probably won't be working together when it comes to the nominations this week. Zach agrees with her and tells her that they both want two entirely different people out of the house. Nicole asks him who Donny wants out and Zach tells her Caleb. Zach confesses that he has no idea who Nicole wants out. Again, he tells her to put him up because he deserves it and that he wants Nicole to get her 30 seconds of fame by getting back at him. (Ha!)

Zach may be pretending to calm and OK with all of this, but he's not. Inside, he's freaking out and that panic begins to show when he asks Nicole who she wants out. Nicole gets frustrated and doesn't want to tell him. Zach tells her how he was straight forward with her last week. Nicole says, "No you're weren't! You bull crapped me!" Your honor, I move that we have the term "bull crap" stricken from the English language.

Jumping ahead a little bit, we find Derrick approaching Nicole. He tells her, "You're not doing too good with your strategy of not winning HOH's. You're not doing the Dan Gheesling strategy no more." Nicole replies that she didn't feel safe this week with the people that were left in the comp. Frankie then interrupts the conversation and begins to talk about the sleeping situation. Nicole remarks that she is "ty-yerred" and wants to go to bed. Frankie says ok and leaves the room.

But then here comes Beast Mode Cowboy attacking a tub of ice cream. He tells Nicole that if he's going up, he wants to be told beforehand. Nicole replies, "I'm ty-yerred. I don't want to be bombarded." Bitch, it's 8pm and you're HOH! Get with the program! It is your job to be bombarded. She then moans and whines (She talks in a permanent whine. It drives me insane!) how she hasn't even talked to Donny yet and how Donny has had a bad day because he was woken up last night (over that whole Team America thing). Beast Mode slurps more of ice cream, "He had a bad day? That sucks."

And then this happened...

Nicole: "How's the ice cream?"
Caleb: "Cold."
Caleb: "Frozen. But it's good though."

Despite the ice cream being cold and frozen, it is to Caleb's liking. That's our cowboy! *jaunty jingle plays*

Eventually, Caleb leaves and finally - finally! - we hear something that makes my ears perk up. Nicole sits up and hints that "2 of those people" (Frankie and Caleb?) are possibilities for her to nominate. Derrick remarks, "You know he [Donny] isn't putting Jocasta up." Nicole then whines, "I haaaate this BOB craaaap." Derrick agrees and tells Nicole that people are going to expect her to put Jocasta up. Derrick says that she was out first in the comp. Nicole whines, "I don't waaant to put her uuuuuup." Nicole remarks again about how she just couldn't throw the comp because she heard that Caleb would put her up at any time and Zach has already nominated her so he might go after her again.

And then Nicole makes me laugh and laugh and laugh. She explains how now she's ready to make big moves. Now she's not as mad as she was before that she won HOH. Now she wants to play the game. (She's so awful!) Nicole tells Derrick that it's time that they solidify things with Hayden and Cody (an alliance?). Derrick brings up how Cody thinks that Frankie is playing them. Nicole nods and replies, "Do you see how he's everywhere?" And this is where things get interesting. Nicole asks Derrick if she were to backdoor Frankie, would he be on board with it? Ohhh I LOVE that! The conversation ends with Derrick warning Nicole not to under any circumstances share the Frankie plan with Christine. Nicole replies, "No. Never. I'm smarter than that." That remains to be seen. Just keep your trap shut.

Derrick then goes to check in with Donny to be sure that he won't nominate any member of Team America (fuck yeah). Donny assures him that he won't and that he doesn't think Frankie would've nominated either of them either. They then discuss the last Team America task. Donny tells Derrick what he said to Julie in the DR. Derrick tells Donny what he said only he lied and lied and lied. Instead of admitting to throwing Donny under the bus, he says that he said some mumbo jumbo about providing for his family. Donny tells him that he thinks America will respect them for not being greedy.

Try It Free! Get 24/7 access to the house PLUS more for 48hrs before you decide!

Donny doesn't definitively say who he's going after, but he says that he wants to keep Zach around to use him for the Team America tasks. Speaking of that, Zach deserves all the money they earned, not them!

Then, like Andy before him, Frankie enters and starts kissing Donny's ass. Frankie and Derrick want Donny to stay HOH so they advise him to put up weak players. Derrick recommends putting up Vivienne and Jocasta. He knows Donny is close to Jocasta, but she went out first. Donny says that he has 3 people in the house that have put him up - Nicole, Caleb, Cody - but that he really wants to win BOB.

More conversations with Donny continue. Cody and his new weekly paranoia (first it was Caleb, then it was Zach) suggests that Donny targets Frankie. Christine hints a little bit about Zach or Caleb. Speaking of Caleb, he spends his time with Donny outlining how he's a beast and a target and, at the end of the day, quite frankly he'll probably win everything. He blames that first week nomination on Devin and says that at the end of the day, Donny is going to do what he wants to do. But don't forget, this is Beast Mode Cowboy and Beast Mode Cowboy will not win every competition that crosses his path. There are other people in the house that don't deserve to be there, but Caleb DESERVES to be there. At the end of the day.

And then we get a rare scene where Violet is talking game is Donny. Donny tells her that he might have to put her up, but that she is 100% not his target. His plan may be to put her up alongside Caleb. Vanya replies, "Oh my gosh." He assures her that Caleb would go home 100%. Vivica would like to believe that, but the block... it's just so emotional. Donny explains that if he puts Caleb up with another "big guy", they might dethrone him and Nicole could put Velda up next to someone like Jocasta. If Valkyrie goes up next to a powerhouse, her chances of staying in the game greatly increase.

Finally, Nicole and Donny get their HOH rooms and are able to meet in private with the real HOH this week - Hayden. Donny tells them that he has talked with everyone and it's looking like he'll put up Caleb and Varinka. Nicole moans about not wanting to put up Jocasta, but having to. So, her nominations are likely to be Jocasta and Zach. Hayden gives those 4 choices his stamp of approval and says that that is what he would've done.

But not so fast! That doesn't mean that one of those 4 will go home. Hayden continues and says that Frankie is the root of all the problems in the house. He is the puppet master. Donny quickly reminds him that he can't say any of that to Christine. Hayden then relays a story he heard right before the live show. He heard Frankie and Christine talking about who they'd nominate if they won HOH. Both said Jocasta and Verushka. But when they discussed who they'd put up as a replacement nominee, they both said Donny.

He continues and tells them how Caleb is going after the "Outsiders" (Donny, Vanessa, Jocasta), but that Caleb rarely comes up with an idea on his own. Hayden says that Caleb gets all of his ideas from Frankie. Hearing this, Donny says how he was talking to Derrick earlier and they were throwing around a bunch of names. He noticed that Derrick never mentioned Caleb and Hayden says that it's because Derrick knows Caleb would never put him up. Hayden remarks, "That's the thing about Caleb. He's so easily controlled."

And here is where the topic of backdooring Frankie comes up again. Donny is worried that if Frankie goes up as a replacement nomination, he won't go home because he has so many friends. Hayden disagrees and says that he doesn't think Frankie has as many votes as Donny thinks he does. Hayden feels confident that he has the votes to get rid of Frankie. He says, "I feel like if it was Frankie and Caleb up there, Frankie would go home. Honestly." Hmm, I'm not sure about that. Don't get me wrong, I love the idea of it and there is no one I'd rather get rid of more than Frankie, but I wonder if all the votes are really there.

What do you think? Can these chuckleheads pull off backdooring Frankie? Will Donny try to stop it because of Team America? Do you like your ice cream cold and frozen like Caleb does? Comment it out bitches and have a great day!

Subscribe to the Big Brother Live Feeds


  1. Great Blog.

    I soooo hope that they get rid of Frankie, that would ruin so many people's games, the people that have benefitted from his will now have to do the their own work, as much as I cannot stand Frankie and his ridiculous "personality", IMO he is the one that has allowed Derrick to look like a wizard in this game, that and the fact that the house is filled with vain and vapid people more worried about getting to the jury than winning it seems. While Frankies game is effective, it is also slightly nauseating, He lies when he doesnt have to, that is the one thing that I always dislike about a player like Frankie. There are lies and then there are personal lies based on nothing other than power tripping and insecurity.

    I hate this season based on 2 things, that Caleb was able to effectively ruin Amber's game because of his delusions and this TA crap. I am glad that Donny said no, he was smart to do that.

    That Vidalia is going to have a rude awakening when she leaves that house, her delusions may not be of the scale of Caleb, but it is quite impressive how she has convinced herself she is a player in this game...where do they find these people?

    Cant wait to see how this shakes out, we know that if Frankie starts to feel vulnerable, he will turn up his game and eventually it will backfore on him, then the fireworks will really start.

  2. I just hope you don't run out of "V" names before she gets evicted.

    1. She could just start using nouns that start with V. Vacuum, Vaseline, Velociraptor... they all still get the point of random across :)

  3. Now that I have thought about it, at the end of the day, I do like my ice cream cold and frozen, while wearing a onesie with bunny slippers. Beast Mode Cowgirl!!! LMAO!!
    Colette, I am sooo looking forward to the Big Brother Gossip show tomorrow night. Bring your extra bitchy self, sending you glitter and gin!!! Glitter and Gin!!!!!!

  4. Speaking of Franky's personality - substitute the singular for the plural. None of them are integrated. Get rid of the bitch and watch the detonators implode.

  5. This comment has been removed by the author.

  6. it cracks me up everytime i read a different V-Name - Love it and love reading this Blog

  7. and the winner is Vanity or Vanacosta or Vanica. The bitch that stares in the mirror all the time. She is so clueless she might just make it to the end, like Jordan!

  8. quit being scary

  9. This season could have been really good if they had gotten one good female player in the game. 2 would have been amazing. The female players this year were just toys for the boys to play this game with.

  10. After don't goes home no more reason to watch big brother get rid of Frankie Cody Christine Nichole is the only have decent ones but after tonight no reason to watch in fact I won't watch your jerks back stabbers vote Donny out big brother sucks no longer a fan