Sunday, August 22, 2010

The Penguin Who Won't Stop Whining

There once was a girl named Megan. She was a lively girl with a vivid imagination who dreamt of being a filmmaker ever since she was a small child. Her dad had gotten her a plastic Playskool camcorder one Christmas and her stop motion Barbie films were legendary at family reunions. It was when Megan got to high school and saw that movie Thirteen that her Barbie flicks got a little "questionable" in subject and went underground. Megan was really into Seattle grunge rock at the time so her Barbie was a major heroin addict who passed out a lot under bridges and traded sexual favors for smack. They were poignant funny films that helped her get all the way to UCLA Film School. She looooved being in the film program. She wore a lot of black and hung out in coffee shops planning Fritz Lang film festivals with her equally arty friends. She smoked clove cigarettes, made out with androgynous boys, and dreamt of being the next female Godard. She wanted to bring French New Wave to America and tell studio heads to "shove it" if they ever dared to tweak her scripts. She saw The Player -every film student saw The Player... that opening tracking shot alone *drool* - so she knew how Hollywood could take something smart and innovative and turn into something fluffy and crappy. Megan (like Homie) wasn't gonna play that. She was going to be a trendsetter, a provacateur.

Graduation came and went and film jobs were few and far between. The only gigs she could get were as a Production Assistant on ambitious underbudgeted Independent films where she was essentially a slave and made only a $40/week stipend or as a coffee girl on lame TV shows... not even Network shows - just some one season basic cable crap. She thought of heading to New York where the film scene was slightly more cerebral, but New York City was expensive - a hell of a lot more expensive than L.A.. So, Megan decicded to bide her time in the mean streets of beautiful downtown Burbank while she saved up for her big move to the elitist East Coast.

Then came the summer of 2010. There was an opening for an Assistant on the Set Production team for the reality show Big Brother. She'd seen the show before and thought it actually might be fun to help construct sets for the competitions. She took a Stage Construction class at UCLA so she knew her way around a drill and a buzz saw. Besides, it paid well and could help her get to NYC. Her first weeks on set were exciting. Her team would work into the wee morning hours painstakingly constructing complicated and labor intensive gigantic competition sets. She loved watching the CBS shows and seeing the HG's swing from a rope she'd hung or race along an obstacle course she'd spent days putting together. For the first time in her fledging film career Megan began to feel a sense of pride. She was a part of something. She belonged.

Around Week 3 Megan began to notice something on the CBS shows that caused her great distress. The HG's were actually THROWING COMPETITIONS and making all her hard work seem insignificant. It was infuriating especially since she was exhausted, dirty, and now missing a thumbnail due to an unfortunate spinning paint can accident. How dare those selfish assholes turn 48 hours of manual labor into 35 minutes of phoniness! She'd inhaled enough sawdust to give her the black lung. Her thighs were so bruised she could never wear shorts lest people think she was a battered girlfriend. Just last week her lesbian best friend, Babs, lost her arm in a horrible chain saw accident while constructing the booths for the trivia contest. Watching Matt grab his crotch, wink, and give a thumbs up to the audience while he purposely gave the wrong answer was like someone jumping up and down on Babs' mutilated and mangled tattooed arm. So when Megan arrived to set bright and early this weekend and heard Prodcuction talking about how Matt might go home, Megan smiled. She smiled so wide her cheeks hurt. Sure, everyone could see where the giant paintbrush has knocked out her incisor tooth, but she didn't care. Someone was gonna pay for Babs' arm and that someone was that overly cocky selfish asshole Matt. Let's recap, shall we?

I'm gonna start where all the drama started - the POV competition. This POV comp was so multi-faceted that people are still debating over exactly who won what. Here's what we know: Lane won a phone call home, Enzo got a penguin suit for a week, Hayden won $5000, Matt or Hayden won a trip to Hawaii, Brendon is on slop until the end of the season, Britney has to be handcuffed to Brendon for 24 hours, Brendon had to shave his head, and Brendon has to take a chum bath every 24 hours. The debate is over exactly what Matt and Hayden won. For some reason, Britney wasn't able to watch all of the competition and some Bra-gade members might be lying to her over who won what. I've heard that Hayden has won both the money and the trip and that Matt has won both the money and the trip. I think it's safe to say that Hayden won something and Matt won something. There's no way Matt walked out of that comp with nothing - either good or bad.

Another big question is whether or not Matt threw the POV. Matt fans on Twitter (the bullies of the #BB12 hashtag) are quick to jump to their tiny love interest's defense claiming we have no idea whether or not he threw it. Listen up chunky monkeys, Britney herself said that she was pissed off that only she, Brendon, and Enzo were the ones fighting for POV and not for prizes. That's proof enough that your golden boy Matt and his giant ego threw yet another comp. I don't like when anyone throws comps. It angers me and makes Endurance challenges boring as all get out. Yes, Matt has won Endurance comps in the past, but the only reason he won those comps is because Ragan let him win them. We have yet to witness a bona fide Endurance comp with two people truly duking it out to the end. What happened to the Endurance comps of yesteryear? Comps that took hours and hours to play with HG's contorted in strange positions and pissing themselves because they refused to give up and use a toilet. I'm not an Evil Dick fan by any means, but the BB8 Endurance comps were nothing short of awesome. I want them back dammit! I want to stay up until 5 AM (EST) watching HG's shivering in cold and crying from pain.

Alright, enough of my bitching. After the POV comp Britney was upset and crying. Hell, if I had to be chained up to Bitch Boy for even 5 minutes I'd be crying my eyes out and punching inanimated objects so, yes, I completely understood her pain and hold nothing against her. At the same time, I think we all knew Brendon was gonna win this comp. I was anticipating it and I was ok with it becuase I thought that maybe Enzo would go home instead. Little did I know that Lane and the Bra-gade has it in their heads that Matt is not only a weasle, but is also the Sabateur. Their logic is that Matt had 2 weeks to use the DPOV which is also the 2 weeks Mr. Salvatore did all his damage. Put 2 and 2 together and voila! Matt is now the Saboteur. So, the Bra-gade is working overtime convincing Britney that Matt needs to go on the block and Ragan needs to go next week. Britney is scared to death she'll be the one to go home next week. Lane tells her sure she'll be going on the block, but Ragan will be going home. She asks what happens if Ragan wins the POV. Lane gets quiet and says, "Oh umm we haven't thought that far yet." As much as dislike Matt and don't give two shits if he goes home, I think it's in Britney's best interest to put up a Bra-gade member and just go ahead and get Enzo out this week. Let's let the curse of the costume live on.

I don't entirely blame the Bra-gade for getting into Britney's head so fast and so furious. Matt and Ragan had hours before Britney was to be handcuffed to Brendon and how do you suppose they spent those hours? Ragan tried to nap and Matt lied around with his hoody wide open and his hand down his pants. They knew something was up. They knew something stank in suburbia. Instead, they wasted precious hours being overly confident and not doing a damn thing. Ragan had reason to feel midly safe so I don't blame him as much I blame Matt. Britney had spent time crying with Ragan over what good friends they were, so chances are he was gonna be safe this week no matter what. Matt, on the other hand, not only threw HOH and most likely the POV, but he also sat around doing nothing when he should have been strategizing. Napolean was exiled to Elba. Can we please send Matt to a remote island in the South Pacific? Specifically one with head hunters and cannibals. Hell, I'd even settle for a leper colony at this point. This cocky nongenius needs to get his due and if it's in the form of angry Melorheotosis patients then so be it. I'm envisioning an angry mob of brittle people with canes, wheelchairs, and IV's banging angrily on Matt's windows. It'll kind of be like that seen in the Thriller video where the zombies break into the house and surround MJ and the chick. If a Melorheotosis choreographed dance followed this invasion, it'll be even better. We'll get Michael Peters to do it and the patients can clink canes in the air or some shit like that. Is John Landis still alive? It could be like a We Are The World thing only it won't feed Ethiopians or shelter Haitians, it'll get Boniva for a bunch of broken hospital patients. I'm predicting a number one hit.

OK so this brings me to BBAD which I'm watching as I type this. Britney and Brendon are handcuffed together and I really have to hand it to them. They're both laughing at their circumstance and working together to make the best of an unfortunate situation. Britney is helping Brendon by being more than accomodating with her HOH room. She stands next to him as he does his chumb bath with nary a complaint to be heard. Brendon, too, has impressed me. Yes, I hate him and I hope he gets a horrible case of Mange from his harlot, but he's doing his chum bath like a trooper and with a smile on his face. I can't fault him for that - not at all. I'm actually finding the other HG's to be much more despicable than Brendon right about now. The bell dinged for Brendon to take his chum bath and he announces, "Here I go! Chum bath #1!" Not one person got up to go watch him. Not one person cheered him on or even stood by to laugh. Instead they stayed put in their lazy supine positions and mumbled, "Yeah whatever." Remember when Zach in BB8 had to do his hourly shower thing (I can't remember what is was specifically)? Everyone came out and laughed and high fived when he did it the first time. There was support and they made it something fun. This lame ass crew is so self absorbed they're not even pretending to make an effort. I don't know why, but I really found it to be disappointing. Kudos to Britney and Brendon for making the best out of a shitty situation. I'm taking a swig of gin (one for me) and spilling a little bit on the ground for you (and one for my homies). Respect. *flashes gang sign*

Meanwhile, Enzo is off in some corner bitching about being in a penguin suit. Are you shitting me? Are you seriously fucking shitting me?! Bitch Boy is covered in dead fish and Britney has to wake up every hour to get splattered with chum and you're complaining about wearing a roomy costume with a bowtie? Unbelievable. I'm gonna say something I never thought would escape my lips: I like Brendon more than Enzo. How's that for a turn of events? The guy shaved his head and has to eat slop for 3 weeks! Enzo is dressed up like a penguin from the Madagascar movies. No comparison. The nerve he has to bitch about something like that. Furthermore, I heard he had the chance to shave his head, but turned it down. Dude, you have NO hair anyways! Shaving your head not only would have been cool, but might have actually improved your appearance. If a Britney/Brendon alliance comes from this, I wouldn't hate it. I could almost be satisfied with it because at least we know these two will never throw a comp.

Let's see, what else, what else? Oh! Britney opened Pandora's Box and got an hour of "advice" from Jessie while the other HG's got a Luau in the backyard. According to Britney, all Jessie talked about was himself and weightlifting. I'm surprised he didn't talk about his secret phone conversations with the married Ragamuffin. All I know is there were a bunch of angry former HG's last night. I keep in touch with quite a few and the only reason I knew Jessie was in the house in the first place was from the texts I got. Too funny. I feel your pain guys, but I honestly think Alison Grodner must be fucking him or something. I mean, why else would she keep bringing him back? I can picture it now. AG in her Spanish style brick home in the Hollywood Hills wearing nothing but a see through negligee while lighting the Pottery Barn candles in her living room. Her curly hair hangs wild down her back while her thighs sensually rub together. Jessie wearing aqua and yellow polka dotted spandex pants rings the doorbell and prepares himself for the night ahead. It's kinda like when Eddie Murphy had to sleep with Eartha Kitt in Boomerang. Jessie wonders if AG's bedroom can maybe get just a tiny bit darker. He's already blown out all the candles, but the moon - that damn moon! - keeps shining into her bedroom and right onto the bed. AG croons, "Hey Mr. Pectacular, how'd you like to go back into the BB house?" Jessie says yes, sighs, slides off his spandex, and begins to make sweet love to our Executive Producer. When AG squeals, the coyotes outside squeal with her. Never has Jessie hated the moon more.

So, what do you think about the big POV? Can Enzo be anymore of a baby? Do you have any respect for Bitch Boy now? Are you happy that Grodner can no longer get pregnant? Comment it out bitches and have a great day!


  1. Did I say team Matt? All I can do is watch at this point. I have to hand it to Hayden, Lane, and Enzo. They are seriously playing all the other HGs. They sit back and watch the blood fly. Everyone else does the work. I was most impressed with how badly Lane lied to Britney yesterday and she sat there and appeared to believe him. Even when she'd done the math on her own jury chances. And you're right about Matt. He laid there, knowing he was for the block and did nothing. Believing Hayden and Lane without talking to Britney.

    This 3-1 vote is dedicated to your arrogance little guy, see ya on finale night.

  2. I hate to say it but I have to agree with you about Brendon. I'm kind of hoping the next time they have to get up for the chum bath, while everyone else is sleeping, they start talking about the fact that they two of them seem to be the only ones willing to do whatever it takes to win, and if they get Matt out this week, they can keep each other safe til the final 2.

    I'm not completely writing off Matt. I wanted him and Britney to make it to the end, and I can see where he might have thought it was a good idea to let someone else have this one, so he could get the next one, but how could he not take into consideration that the boys TOLD him they were going to vote him out last week instead of Lane? The boys want to keep Lane, Lane is very close to Britney, think it through, Matt, where does it lead? To Matt being in trouble. It doesn't take a diabolical super genius to figure that out.

    And, part of the reason I was rooting for Matt is because Rachel wanted him out. The only thing that really bothers me about Matt leaving is imagining the satisfied look on Rachel's face. But, I'm thinking, if Britney remembers her BB history, she should think back to BB9, when Ryan made it to the final 2 with Adam, and I think a big reason why Adam won was because everyone hated Ryan's girlfriend and didn't want her benefiting from Ryan winning. I think that could play a big part in the jury vote, if Brendon makes it that far. And if he takes Britney with him, and the rest of the jury is good and sick of Rachel by that point, then Britney stands a chance at winning.

    Missed the blog yesterday. Happy to see it again today. Those first few paragraphs weren't semi-autobiographical, were they? ;)

  3. Creme you're too smart for your own good. Yes, I got $40/week to be a slave on a low budget Indie film. Worst summer of my life. No wait, I take that back. *This* summer is the worst summer of my life.

  4. You're back! Yay!! The first part was classic!

    I hate to admit too, but Brendon wasn't that bad last nite. The guy's kind of thoughtful. He tried not to get chum on Britney. And when Kathy was on slop he made her have not cot as cushy as possible. He's a nice guy. But he's still a douche.

    Matt's an idiot. But you could see last night that it's starting to dawn on him that he's on the outs. His face last night when they were all sitting around the hot tub was a tad forlorn. I think he doesn't want to admit that the cool kids are kicking him out of the gang. He better snap to it. I couldn't care less if Matt stays or goes but I'd rather Enzo the whiner go. If for no other reason than he eats like a manic cow. Listening to him smack and chew makes me wanna hurl.

    And can someone get Ragan some paxil or cymbalta or something? Damn that man is more upset about what happens to Matt than himself. Newflash, Ragan; Matt would vote you out. You need to worry about Ragan. And ask the DR for a mild anti depressant. Your snifling is working on my nerves.

  5. It seems Hayden DID win both the trip AND the 5k!

  6. after reading the reports of Brendon & Brit comparing notes on everyone, after seeing dunk #12 where they are BOTH still being champs,while Matt&Ragan cried for hours alone and whined and Hayden/Lane did nothing to support the chums, I gotta fall on Team Brenney. They havent coasted thru the game, they worked hard, and since Rachel has been gone, Bren has been a new person. I foresaw the Brenney alliance coming weeks ago, I just never thought the self-centered and completely snowed Britney would think that far ahead. But it seems that after they get rid of Matt & Ragan, its gonna be Brit/Brendon vs Hay/Enzo/Lane, and we can all see who is gonna be victorious on that. I dont want Brendon to win the big prize, I dont want any of them to at this point, but Brit/Brendon have earned my respect.

  7. Then what did Matt get? He had to have gotten something - good or bad.

  8. Creme,

    It isn't that I'm giving up on Matt, but if he goes up on the block, he's done. And it just looks like he's depending on Britney to piece that together herself. I think you're right that she was playing both sides of the house to get Brendon out, because everyone told her that was their goal. But after that POV, she still has a chance to set herself up, but I can't figure out if she'll do it. She seems to think that the big, strong boys will save her. Because Lane said it and Lane would never lie to her.

    Matt's only hope is to straight up ask Britney, Brendon or no Brendon and out the Brigade.

  9. sounds like brendon deserves the veto...can't believe i actually have a bit of respect for him and his game play. hopefully this new found respect for brendon won't have a negative impact on me

    love the blog, look forward to it every day and go into lala withdrawals when you don't post. thank you for the laughter

  10. I hate to admit it, but I started to feel a little bit of respect for Brendon myself last night watching the feeds. He did what he had to do to stay in the house and took it like a man. That's more than I can say for the rest of them. The sad part is that right now he's the only chance Britney has to make it to the final two if they both wake up and see that everyone else is playing them both. Ugh.

  11. Missed you yesterday. Was happy to get up this morning and visit LaLa Land. The opening part of your blog was great!

    I think Matt's only chance right now is to go to Brendon and Brit and out the Brigage and team up with them. The three of them could do some serious damage to the brigade if they worked together. Can't believe I'm actually rooting for Brendon to stay longer than the Meow-Meow but Enzo is driving me crazy and I can't wait to see him leave!

  12. love your blog and your willingness to give us what we need...our daily dose of YOU! thanks for watching this crap in the middle of your shittiest summer ever and reporting back each week better, funnier, and more accurate than the week rock

    now, i can not believe i am tying this...but goooo brendon??? i am STILL a brittney for the win fan, but brendon has truly proven himself as "all in" and fighting for his life in this is such a shame that he hitched his "wagon" to witchy poo so early on, i wouldve liked to see him play from the beginning....
    ...this is by far the most disgusting "punishment" i have seen on BB .... and BOTH of them have performed like's hoping they can keep it together....also, i am so tired of the lazy-ass guys this season...if i were matt (or any one of them) i would have been out there all night keeping them company and not being so arrogant as to feel safe enough to allow britt and bren to have all this pillow talk, game talk and time to compare notes without protecting myself....i am soooo over them....
    one final about a banner over the jury house: "britt and bren are inseparable, sleeping, showering, hot tubbing together...."

  13. I have always thought of Brendon as a competitor this season. Brit needs to look no further than the end of the chain for her chance at the F2. Not one other houseguest is going to take her to the end. I did not care at all for Rachel. I have not seen Brendon cry any more than any other houseguest, maybe even less.

  14. Good morning......starting with "Britney opened Pandora's Box" I was laughing so hard I wanted to cry! Your writing ability is out of this world. A twosome of Brendon and Britney going to the end sounds good to me, the news could get back to Rachel and Brendon would be saved in more ways than one....maybe his sanity would return! I still want Brendon to go far in this game, he has played hard. Lane, Hayden and Enzo may have entertainment value but nothing more than that. I too noticed when Brendon went for the first Chum dunk on BBAD...not one of them came over. Hopefully it wasn't lost on him. Before last night I had a hard time listening to Britney anymore, but her rendition of Jesse's visit is hilarious and her kindness to Brendon in his hour of need makes me actually like her now. Once again Colette, thanks for the wonderful job you do on here, you are the best at bringing the fun to dysfunctional.

  15. Okay, how fugally is Britney's Nick? I hope he was sweating it out seeing Brit and Bren last night. Brendon was just a HOT mess...showering off every hour.

    That chain was too long between the cuffs..Brit probably cried her eyes out and they added the darn chain. I'm hoping Brit and Bren fight off the Brigayed and Brit and Ragen make final two...

  16. So far as I can tell, Matt got screwed by AG (& NOT like Jessie). Seems he really got nothing but a pathway to the JH. Britt got Jssie & Ragan got the sidelines to boo hoo for Matt (his friend w/impeccable integrity.)

  17. P.S. Did you know that "meow-meow" is the nickname for a dangerous drug called Mephedrone?

  18. Both Brendon and Rachel are somewhat likable when they are NOT together. So, I have been in the closet for the past few days, but I must step boldly out and proclaim my 'fandom' for Brendon. He is a true competitor, and I have to respect that!! It would be GREAT if he, Britney and Ragan would align--at least they know they would run the house as far as competitions are concerned! I cannot wait to see the double-eviction next week! That should be interesting...3 beached whales just 'wallerin' (that's a GA term for wallowing)around while only Brendon and Ragan fight. We shall see...

  19. Now they're all saying that production made Matt's buzzer quit working so that he would lose the PoV. (You'd think if there was a malfunction that they would have stopped the comp and fixed it, but who knows with BB...) And that production wants to make sure Matt doesn't win because of his lie. Well... production didn't make him throw the HoH. So I have no sympathy for him or anyone throwing competitions. I'm sure it could be a good stategy at one point maybe early in the game... but that's all these people do. The LAZIEST cast ever.

    Lots can happen before Thursday. I wouldn't be surprised to Enzo walk out that door. He's on the block, on slop, and in a penguin suit for another 5 days... I think he'll flip out and have 10 penalty noms before eviction day.

    I actually did not believe Britney about Jesse... his website says he is in Chicago all weekend for the Wizard Comic Con, but now that I listen to her more... I guess she could be telling the truth. She seems to have a lot of details.

    I just can't wait until Rachel finds out that Britney was chained to HER MAN.

    Great blog today, Lala.

  20. Britney HAS thrown comps before AND it's no surprise that she's nice to Brendon now -- she butters up whomever has power (remember the Rachel bubblebaths OR even the conversation with Rachel in the HOH room when Rachel returned?).

    Enzo is the most detestable of them all. He's lazy and disgusting, but nose-picking Brendon is no prize....I can't stand to watch him talk. Although at the end, when it's Brendon vs. anybody but Ragan/Matt, I'd vote for Brendon. The rest of the backstabbing do-nothings don't deserve it.

    Ragan is upset because he thought BB would be a fair competition and he's now realized that BB is completely fixed for drama and ratings. He also realizes that the fix means he doesn't have a chance. He's most upset about being played by BB and knowing that he looks like a fool. As he has a history of rejection from his closest family members (Mom as infant, Dad at 18), he also doesn't deal well with rejection once he's gotten close to someone.

  21. Your ENTIRE blog is fantastic, it trully sucks when I can't read it every day.

    I have to join the others and complement Brendon, he did fight his ass off and took the punishments like a man. I don't want him to win, Bozo Enzo either, and I hope that Brit realizes her only chance is to team with Brendon and Matt or Regan and Matt.

    I am sick of Hayden, Lane, and especially Enzo. They could have kept the Brigade together with Matt and coasted to the final 4, but that would assume that these pussies would get off their ass and try to do something. For all the talk of booting the floaters and keeping the competitors, they talk that talk but don't walk that walk. Enzo is the worst, he's only good for a good comic line every once in a while, and him leading the charge to break up the Brigade falls on his narrow shoulders.

    Will Britney wake up and realize that this is the turning point in the game???? Does she really believe that competitors stay and coasters leave?

    It's ballcheck time- lets see what you got.

  22. My dream: Enzo gets evicted in his penguin suit that he's forced to wear to the jury house because he donated all his clothes and tells Rachel, "Yo, your man was chained to Britney for 24 hours. He had to take a bath once an hour during that time, yo and they had to sleep together and go to the bathroom together yo." And then I'd giggle as Rachel's head exploded.

    I do not like Matt and I think a lot of his fan base are bullies and I would not care if he went this week if I didn't think that was a death sentence for Britney. I do not want Enzo, Lane, and Hayden getting their way AT ALL. That would actually force me to root for Brendan and that's just wrong. Matt thinks because he's a genius he has this all figured out but most geniuses aren't that great socially and at reading people and apparantly that's Matt's kryptonite if he still thinks the Brigade is in tact. I want to slap him and his rabid fans who are now screaming foul and that Matt's buzzer wasn't working. They take something that was mentioned in passing casually that hasn't been proven and run with it as fact. AUGH!!

    Oh and Enzo ... seriously.. you've actually played in 2 comps now and apparantly you think that means you should win. Actually trying does not equal a win, douchebag. Quit the pity party.

    Okay, I'm done now ... Britney and Brendon for final 2, I guess because the rest suck.

  23. Last night Hayden admitted to Enzo & Lane that he took both the money & the trip but they are blaming on Matt. The 3 stooges have to get rid of Matt because he is the only one of the Brigade thats won anything. I have a new respect for Brendon after watching last night. Hoping Britney, Matt, Brendon & Regan form an alliance and oust the 3 stooges for being all talk & no action.

  24. Ok first you are the woman Colette. Thank you for working so hard for us and this excellent blog!
    Now I feel like a fool. I am starting to like Brendon and I think it is because in some Superman/Clark Kent way I don't recognize him with his head shaved and no stink of Big Red on him. It's as if the chum has washed her off and he is all shiny and new! He opens doors for the lady and he is smiling and joking.
    Which brings me to Enzo. Unlike Casey smoking and singing his Banana Suit song he is just complaining and scowling. He is pointing out Matt's faults which are a mirror image of his own. He talks about how Matt and Ragan areso close and look out for one another, i.e. side alliance, when he made one with HFF and Brendon. hmmm the chum smells better than this!
    I miss the all out battles too. They were what we looked forward to. The smacktalk, the taunting, the trickery "I almost fell, no I didn't, I can see your breast oh sorry you fell."
    By the way "Go ahead and leave your finger in your nose for an hour Haystack! No one will see you. It's allright! "

  25. Will Enzo's penalty point be used against him this week?

  26. Enzo is a bigger pansy than Ragan. At least Ragan's sobbing is not as annoying as Enzo's bitching and eating.

  27. Loved it today! I'm gaining more...something...for Brendon..he proved himself a little through this. Enzo is trash and I can't stand him. Matt...well I think I made my feelings clear on twitter - He threw the comp and he's trying to place the blame on production, which is sending everyone into a tizzy. My fave part of the blog was when you said that Ragan and Matt had HOURS to work out something more solid w/ Brit and didn't. They are cocky pieces of shit who I'd like to see go home one right after the other...

  28. Great job, as usual. I'm also willing Brit, Brend, Matt, and Ragan to have an honest sit down here. I despise Hayden and I'm bitter that he has made me like Brendon a bit. The Enzo, Lane and Hayden fiasco, that I guess AG loves so much ( perhaps her obsession with Jesse is over and has her eye on Hayden or Lane ), has me sick to my stomach. (I must look into that, why do I even care about this?!)
    I want Hayden outed for the lizard (complete with tongue always poking his nose)that he is..He is so afraid of standing next to anyone successful that he needs to go...NOW

  29. the difference between brendon and enzo is that brendon became a douche due to circumstances and relationships arising from the game. enzo is and always has been a douche of the highest level, naturally and without provocation. he could cleanse the entire female world population for a year he's such a big douche. brendon is still a tool, but GOD DAMN, ENZO IS A FUCKING TOOL FACTORY! he's the entire tool industry personified.

  30. i agree, why did enzo not shave his head? it probably wasn't even originally part of the competition, but BB felt like throwing enzo a softball with the shave your head option. two birds with one stone. hook up their fredo corleone with POV and solve that riddle on top of his head at the same time. but the delusional pussy pussy refuses to release the sad and slipping grasp he still has on his youth by shaving his head. of course i haven't seen the competition, but this is how it plays out in my mind.

  31. Please... LATE NOTICE... find 19 virgins and do your magic and have Brit put up Hayden as a pawn. Enzo HAS TO GO HOME/JURY/WHATEVER. I'm sooooooooooo over the meow meow. This season is messing up my sex life totally. Damn live feeds!!!! I should be smart and ONLY read your blog. Should be and will be are two different things sadly. LOVE LOVE LOVE etc your blog. I hope I do you some sort of justice if I make it on this show (even though Kathy F'd it up for most people over 30 something).

    Do you EVER sacrifice Leprechans? It may be a thought now. I would love a final 3 of Brit, Matt, Ragan... just a little wish in this LAME season.

  32. I'm disliking Enzo, the baby, more & more and (I can't believe I'm saying it) w/Rachel out of the house -- Brendan is actually tolerable.

    Nights like this and the past week illustrate why I'll be canceling BBAD and Showtime earlier than ever. Once Britney leaves, it'll be an all male pool tournament all the time. How dull! Maybe Ragan can liven it up a bit, but I doubt it. Watching them play pool is like watching paint dry.