Thursday, July 11, 2013

Sophie's Choice



Firstly, welcome Canada! We wanted you rubbing noses and asses with us from the very beginning. But today, with my maple syrup nipples, I can officially welcome you back to the Big Brother family. That's right bitches, your prayers have been answered. Canada, you can get your Live Feeds now!

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And believe me, if there is any season that you want the Live Feeds for, it is this season. It is almost annoyingly great. I say "annoying" because yours truly can never seem to take a day off! My alcohol intake has slowed to nil, my bathtub full of gin has things growing in it and I haven't watched Bravo in like 4 days. Once again, on my planned day off, the house flies into a tailspin so profound that it could change the entire direction of the season.

Here is where we left off - The Moving Company seemed all but unbreakable. Douche after douche after douche crossed their hearts and hoped to die, stick a needle in their eye. Meanwhile, Amanda has been trying to finagle a way to keep Elvira (Elissa) and send a blow to what she suspected was a men's alliance. Spencer and Howard got themselves all worked up over Amanda's efforts and put her on the top of their target list for next week. McCrae reassured the MC that even though Amanda was doing her own thing, McCrae was still onboard to evict Elvira. So, no matter how hard Amanda worked or how many votes for Elvira she managed to get, Elvira was still going home because of McCrae's loyalty to the MC.

And then we saw last night's episode of Big Brother on CBS. As someone who has her eye on the house 18 hours of the day, I am rarely surprised by anything CBS has to show me. Until last night. Last night we were privy to a chink in the MC armor. It appears that the other members of the MC (save Spencer) aren't exactly thrilled with the idea of Asshat (Jeremy) bossing them around and giving them orders. Whatever Asshat says, goes, making the other members of the MC resentful. It was an interesting edit that is clearly laying down the foundation for the MC to crumble... perhaps tonight.

For all of you CBS-only viewers out there, here is another thing you should know - Elvira is rarely on the live feeds. So while she may have dominated last night's episode, I've seen her exactly once this week when she almost took a dump on the Have-Not floor. Overall, she is an incredibly boring houseguest. I rarely get to write about her because she is simply never around.

BUT, and this is a big but, I loathe Jeremy and his meaty cohorts so goddamn much that all week I've been struggling over whether or not I want Elvira to stay in the game. Yesterday, I wanted her gone. Today, I want her to stay. I've weighed the pros and cons over and over again and it all comes down to longevity for me. You see, I like Amanda and McCrae. I like them a lot and there is no way in hell I want Amanda in danger next week. In order for her to be safe, I'm going to need Elvira to stick around a little longer. Losing Nick really isn't going to bother me or impact anyone other than VaGina (Ginamarie) which, let's face it, will be AWESOME. Nick is another one of those Houseguests that you rarely see. He sleeps a lot and seems to be playing by the Dan Gheesling principle of being invisible. I hate that!

The Pros to keeping Elvira are as follows:
1) Asshat will throw an enormous hissy fit.
2) Spencer will tinkle in his pants.
3) VaGina will lose her ever-loving mind.
4) Eyebrows (Kaitlin) will probably cry.
5) Amanda will be much safer.
6) McCrae will have finally left that godawful alliance.
7) The MC's dreams of being the most famous alliance in BB history are CRUSHED.

The Cons to keeping Elvira are as follows:
1) THE MVP IS SO UNFAIR!!!
2) The Brenchel army.
3) Hnmm Mnmm
4) People like Candice and Helen could stay in the game longer than they should.
5) McCrae becomes the number one target of the remaining MC's.

So, if I add all of this up - and even though I HATE the idea of Elvira winning MVP every week - I think I would like Nick to get evicted tonight. If I think long term... if I propel myself forward to August and imagine a house filled with douches slapping each other on the backs... if I picture that nightmare, I have no choice but to, reluctantly, hope Elvira is safe.

Now, some of you might be saying to yourselves, "But Lala, McCrae will never leave the MC!" Yesterday, I would have agreed with you. Today, not so much. You see, it looks like the young curly fop might be officially jumping ship. Amanda spent the day rustling up votes for Elvira and uncovering dirt on the men's alliance. She was also called into the Diary Room repeatedly which makes me think that the DR was telling her not to give up. And after what I saw last night on CBS, I have a sneaking suspicion that the DR may be gently nudging McCrae out of the MC. I loathe DR interference as much as the next person, but I also really really really want to see Asshat go insane. It's Sophie's Choice! The inner conflict, morality at war with instinct, teeter totter, this way or that, the angel and the devil... oh god, it's delicious.


And so, in summation, as of right now there are 5 votes to evict Elvira (Asshat, Spencer, Howard, Eyebrows, VaGina) and there are 5 votes to evict Nick (Amanda, Candice, J-U-DD, Andy, Jessie). The lone undecided vote is McRae. Will he stay loyal to the MC and eventually lose the game to a jerk like Asshat or Spencer? Or will he leave the MC for good and join his woman in an all out war against the men? I don't know! No one knows! And, don't you love it?! I can't ever remember going into a live eviction show where I was absolutely clueless.

So, what do you think McRae will do? Will he grow a sack and leave the MC? Would you rather see Elvira or Nick evicted? Does the inner turmoil tickle your nether regions? Comment it out bitches and have a great day!

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20 comments:

  1. I agree with you! I want Amanda safe and I would love to see Jeremy, Aaryn, and GinaMarie lose it over Elissa staying.

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  2. Anything to make Jeremy and Aaryn cry and I'm in! And it would be fun to see cocky Nick's face when he is evicted. I want Amanda to win! Love her! Amanda for MVP!
    Misslizzy1973

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  3. As much as I hate to admit it, I've jumped on the Keep Elissa bandwagon - for this week, at least. For all the reasons you give, but mostly for Pro 1). I'd love to see the Assimal get all Scott Weintraub and get thrown out on his Almost Cherokee ass. Yeah, that's what I want. Add Amanda winning HOH and MVP, and I'm set for nighttime fantasies for the next week.

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  4. That would flip things around and there is already soo much talk of wanting to hurt, kill or bash someone's head... I wonder if they are near the tipping point of no return and force BB to blacking out the feeds and opening a BB triage tent on the back lawn and have to send in a cleaning crew to mop up the carnage. This is a sad bunch of angry people save a few.

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  5. I agree with you...i keep asking myself...."how awful does Jeremy (&his co-horts) have to be for me to be rooting for ANYTHING related to rachel???? but as of now, i am "team elizza" and hoping for a nick eviction. thanks for sorting out the shenanigans and putting to paper everything I feel!
    ~carolyn

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  6. Yes, last night's DR sessions were eye opening. I like what "above" said ~ How awful does Jeremy have to be for me to root for Rachel 0.5? Elvira DID dominate last night's show. Someone needs to tell her that the word "like" in every other sentence is so 10 years ago. But I disagree that Helen and Candace don't deserve to be there. Candace is pretty smart at figuring things out and Helen has worked hard to make deals and it did kind of sound like Aryan might just take her up on that offer. Talk about making a deal with the devil.

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    1. I didn't say Helen and Candice don't deserve to be there. I just happen to find them kind of boring. They don't bring me any drama. If they did, I'd like them more.

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  7. Here's hoping this comment actually makes it onto the blog. The Internets don't like my logins, I guess.

    From production's point of view, it's awfully convenient that all of the "hate speakers" are now on one side of the house. (Yeah, I know Amanda said some stuff, but not much.) They've got themselves a good versus evil thing going on, which they will exploit in ridiculous ways, and use to deflect the complaints against their casting choices this season. Plus, Elissa gets to be on the side of good! That's a win for Production, even if the evil side manages to take down a few people along the way.

    My biggest worry with this new alignment is that the "good" side is filled with undisciplined people that will be hard for McManda to keep moving in the same direction over time. Managing Andy, Jessie, and Candice (I like Candice, btw) is going to be a nightmare. And though I love Amanda, and want to watch her for a long time, she will be target-tastic for the other side unless she and McC can find a way to plan effectively, week to week, and in the event they lose a HOH or veto.

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  8. I actually like Elissa. Don't get me wrong: the Brenchel army is *SO* annoying, and the MVP week after week sucks. BUT. She's still.. cool? Maybe it's her motherly aura that makes her seem more human than her sister on TV.

    Nick has played too hard, too fast. Buh-Bye.

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  9. I think you are putting too much stock in those TMC diary room sessions. Those sessions had to have been before Nick was put up as a replacement and it appeared that Kaitlin would be the one to go up instead. Jeremy was throwing a hissy because he did not want to lose his sqauw (sorry - I know this is offensive but I could not resist). I am not a fan of Jeremy AT ALL and look forward to the day his TMC alliance turns on him but it will not be this week.

    Jeff

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    1. I was talking about the DR sessions all day yesterday. McCrae and Amanda were both called in repeatedly.

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    2. I was referring to this line... "And after what I saw last night on CBS", which is part of your argument but I get your point. BB usually does find a way to impose its will on the house. Keep up the great work. I've been reading your blogs for years, it gives me something to do at work before the afternoon caffeine kicks in.

      Jeff

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  10. I stumbled across this blog last night during my Daily Big Brother Twitter Spoiler Hunt and I am in love! I have rarely laughed so hard while all alone in my house. Thank you so much for writing in the same style as my sense of humor.

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  12. OK! I hate Asshat and have been reluctantly rooting for Elvira to stay. Then after seeing lasts nites episode and the Sun. episode and seeing the behavior of all the girls (not the women just the girls) behavior and how stupid, disgusting, immature and jealous they are of each other and everyone else I did a complete 180 and was rooting for Asshat to dominate the game and throw them bitches out on there immature asses.

    Here's my reasoning. All those girls have been so far up those douche-bags asses it is sickening. All they care about is hooking up with a guy in the house instead of playing a game for half a mill. If they are so stupid as to let a complete loser like Asshat con them then they deserve to be played like a fiddle and then kicked to the curb.

    None of those males have anything to give up a half a mill for. They are not nice guys, good looking, sexy, charming, personable or funny. They are no Jeff Schroeder that is for sure. I am not saying Jeff is worth giving up a half mill for but at least he was funny, personable, nice looking and of course fun to look at. Asshat by far is the least attractive of them all. In looks and personality.

    But like I said if those bitches would rather fool around on TV and let themselves be used by such a low life like Asshat then more power to Asshat. But from what I've read on all the different blogs that cover the live feeds it looks like Spencer and Howard are having a change of heart and are now on board with evicting Nick. Either way I have made peace.

    If Elvira stays then I will enjoy the meltdown of Aryan Nation and Asshat. If Elvira goes then I will enjoy watching Asshat use and abuse those stupid girls and kick each one of them to the curb and showmance and steam roll his was to the finals and win the half mill.

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  13. Ding dong Moving Company is dead and I could not be happier! YAY!!

    I agree that folks like Candice and Jessie don't need to be in the game but Helen is WORKING it. That woman has been scheming all week. Amanda did a great job, yes, but Helen played a huge role in flipping Spencer and Howard.

    Any hoo. I cannot wait until the feeds come back on tonight and Asshat is mid melt down. Do we have to wait for the west coast to catch up? I can't wait for the insanity. It's gonna be perfection!

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  14. WTF was up with the Chenbot's Valley of the Dolls jumpsuit?!? Mint green jersey, oh yeah...

    I hope McManda can breathe easy now. The d-bags in the house must be crushed! Racist Barbie must go.

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  15. I hate the annoying mom alliance. This season sucks, hoh means nothing so it's not even exciting to watch that. I hope the 3 douchebags do self evict since CBS did this stupid MVP crap

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  16. I actually despise the "Brenchel Army", but keeping her may enable the formation of a "boyfriend/girlfriend super alliance." Even though I would enjoy the MC to complete the game unchallenged, but I have had doughts from the start. Those young straight men have to have their women. Without their women they are gay, and they are not gay. The girls here have a great opportunity to defeat the men because of their scatteredness. The more the think about dominating the game with a bro-alliance the more they controlled by the females.I sound like a gay Ferengi. Asshat is really getting bossy, but he is hot. Yes I am gay.

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  17. Finally, someone else agrees that it has been Amanda this whole time a'movin and a'shakin the entire house!! Love her and McCrae and I like Helen and Judd. But Amanda rocks the house everyday. Is she a little too aggressive? Maybe....but she acts like I would like to act if I was in the BB house and IF I had the set of balls she has.

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