Bridgette: Perfectly Nice, Perfectly Awful

Meet 24 year old California native and Traveling Nurse, Bridgette Dunning. There's not much to say about Bridgette because she was either in a hurry when filling out her CBS.com bio or homegirl wasn't able to think of anything interesting to say. She likes to do yoga, run, read sci-fi books, and go to comedy shows. The three words she uses to describe herself are: optimistic, energetic, and awesome. What a nightmare. And her life motto is "follow your heart." *yawn* I'm already bored.

Let's see if perhaps we can gather more information on Bridgette from her interview. First off, Bridgette smiles a lot. A lot, a lot, a lot. She describes herself as a big fan of Big Brother and thinks it's "ca-razy" that she's sitting in the Diary Room being interviewed by an enormous doofus. With only a few sentences out of her mouth, I'm getting plain, humdrum, normal, and the most horrific of words... NICE. She's perfectly nice and that, my friends, is perfectly boring.

Bridgette leaves behind a boyfriend and a cat named Hercules. Being a Traveling Nurse, Bridgette is able to adapt to new environments quickly and oh my god I'm so bored right now. As if sensing the demise of my soul, Bridgette decides to finish me off by saying, "I'm a really bad liar. Tee hee hee." Naturally, Bridgette doesn't like bullies or when people pick on others fucking hell I want to die. She also thinks condescending people are icky. One thing she can't imagine happening is that America will hate her. I HATE YOU. I hate you with a burning fiery passion that begins in the pit of my stomach and radiates to all of my nether regions.

I'm sure she's swell in real life and that's fine, but that does nothing for my summer. Next!

Victor: Hashtag #Is #Not #A Lothario

Next up is 25 year old Gym Manager Victor Arroyo from Slidell, LA. Victor, quite humbly, describes himself as "smart, sexy, and fit." I think we'll be the judge of that, Victor. Not you. There's a little bit of a Latin Eric Bana vibe happening except you went and ruined it all by putting your hair behind your ears and matting it down in a distinctly unappealing way. Plus, shall I tell my lovely readers what your life's motto is? Get ready to be inspired ladies... "Get my money, develop my body, and get women." Yeah, soooooo... a-douche! Excuse me. I sneezed.

Victor is disappointingly horrible. He says that more than anything else in the world, he loves women. The only thing is that he is never satisfied and is always looking for the next girl to talk to. No, you don't love women. You love yourself and you are incredibly insecure. You mask it with all this nonsense talk and faux machismo. I wanted a cool Latin hottie in the house, but you sir are not it.

(Photo via Instagram)

All I need to know about you, good sir, I have learned from the above photograph. He hashtagged #not. Then he hashtagged #even. #Shoulder I can see having some relevance, but #day? Duuuuude, you're the worst. Look, I'm a fitness addict too. I devote myself to a healthy active lifestyle, clean eating, and all that crap, but I will never hashtag the word #day because it is a futile exercise in douchebaggery. I'm almost scared to see him in motion.

Ok he's not as horrible as I imagined. He looks straight into the camera and I can appreciate that sort of confidence. Victor's personality is definitely much better in person than it is on paper. On paper, I was ready to stab the guy, but he's quite personable. He thinks his managerial skills as well as his physical attributes will serve him well in the game. He also hopes he never loses at anything which means it is going to be so awesome when he loses a comp! Very Caleb I think. He'll blame the comp for favoring bigger feet or lighter weight or something like that. It'll be everyone else's fault that Victor loses, never his own. Tee hee hee.

Naturally, Victor is single and has no problems getting involved in a Showmance. If that doesn't work out, he'll just go ahead and flirt with everyone anyways. Surprisingly, when it comes down to it, Victor would rather lose the money and have America love him, than win and be hated. The guy he presents on paper wouldn't feel that way. I'm getting the sense that the bravado and the creepy lecherous comments might all be an act. In that case, Victor could hold some promise. I'm not ready to write him off quite yet. Let's wait and see how he acts once the game begins.

Do you think Victor is as awful as his bio? You need to Live Feeds to make a decision!