Thorny Balls

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A passing comment. A mumble on the wind. A teeny tiny little droplet of syllables. So seemingly harmless yet, over time, it can grow thorns. Razor sharp little daggers to pierce the soul and let all the happiness ooze out leaving a lifeless wet noodle in its wake. If you dwell on it, the burrs will multiply and stick clinging to your hair, your sweater vests, your comfy woolen socks... Best to shake off the ugly and smile a toothy grin. Best to pretend you never heard it at all. Best to hold your head high... and your middle finger higher. Let's recap, shall we?

The day began under a lazy haze. After an eventful POV Saturday night, the Houseguests happily slept away half of Sunday. Of course Helen has been up since the crack of dawn prancerizing hither and thither and being all around awful. J-U-DD and Elvira (Elissa) are somewhat early risers as well. And this is where we begin... outside listening to, "Hnmm mnmm ahummina hummina hnmm mnmm."

J-U-DD and Elvira are discussing who they'll be friends with after this season ends. J-U-DD tells Elvira that he thinks Aryan likes her now. Elvira replies, "Oh wow! I feel like the luckiest girl in the world now! Hnmm mnmm." And then she rolled her eyes and launched into another one of her 18 hour long rants about how she would never associate with someone who says derogatory remarks... "I'd never be friends with someone like that, hnmm mnmm. It's all about people's character. Just because they go from mean to nice doesn't change who they are, unh." Pot meet kettle. If we tally up our score cards of people who have said mean things in the house, Elvira would be champion of the universe.

In addition to hurling insults with unparalleled aplomb, Elvira is a master whiner. And we are once again treated to her bitching and moaning about how all the girls in the house are so mean to her. They always talk about her, hnmm mnmm, and say like the meanest things. Mind you, this is coming from the girl who told Amanda to her face that she was disgusting and J-U-DD that he was a crazy ridiculous liar. Speaking of J-U-DD, listening to this his eyes kind of glaze over and we all smile happily to ourselves knowing he's floating along that Xanax highway of his.

Evira then asks J-U-DD what he thinks of Amanda. J-U-DD says he really likes Amanda. Elvira replies, "Hnmm mnmm, people in the house are saying you want her out." J-U-DD brushes the cobwebs out of his face and asks, "Who said that? I never said that." Elvira tells him that like 3 people said it. J-U-DD asks her if it was Candice, Howard and Spencer. Elvira tells him no and then asks, "So you never said Amanda made you mad by picking your nominations?" J-U-DD tells Elvira that Amanda didn't pick his nominations at all. Amanda wanted Howard on the block, but J-U-DD never nominated him. This may sound relatively innocuous, but here is what you need to know. Helen was the one going around the house telling people that J-U-DD was all broken up and shattered that Amanda was running his HOH. It was Helen, Elvira's best good friend, that has been spreading these lies. Is Elvira starting to suspect that Helen isn't 100% trustworthy? Will the two eventually turn on one another? I hope so!

Aryan then comes outside - which is Elvira's cue to run away and hide. J-U-DD asks Aryan who she is going to put on the block as a replacement nominee (Spencer won POV). Aryan tells him she is definitely putting Candice up, but she doesn't really care if Candice or Howard goes home. J-U-DD mumbles that it would be silly to get rid of Candice right now because Howard is a much bigger threat and can win HOH next week. I am inclined to agree with J-U-DD on this. Production will do whatever they can to save and protect Howard. And if by some miracle he survives the week, expect next week's HOH to be a "Name that book in the Bible" comp.

Inside, we find Helen and Andy in the cockpit. Like I discussed on the Big Brother Gossip Show this weekend, Helen has one thing on her mind and that is JURY. Jury this, Jury that, hurry hurry hurry, let's get these people to Jury. Her entire game strategy is stacking that Jury with people who will vote for her to win. So, when you wonder why Howard is going before Candice it's because Helen doesn't trust Howard to vote for her to win. Helen's worry after Howard is Spencer and how he could possibly vote were he to get to Jury.

Helen asks Andy if he thinks Spencer knows about the deal she made with Aryan (if Aryan won HOH, she would let Helen's alliance pick her noms). Andy tells her that Spencer absolutely knows about the deal because Aryan told him about herself. Helen then asks Andy if he thinks Spencer will go after her if he wins HOH. Andy tells her that he doesn't think so. He also tells her that he can control Spencer because they're really close (Ha!). Helen brings up Jury again and worries about letting certain people get too far. Andy then tells Helen that he wants Elvira out sooner rather than later. He doesn't like the fact that she's a loose cannon. Helen nods and says, "For sure", but honestly she wants Elvira there for the long haul. Helen not only knows she can win against Elvira, but she knows that Elvira is most likely a Jury vote she's got in the bag.

Helen then tells Andy that it was Jessie who came up with the plan to keep Aryan safe. True, Jessie was anti-Eyebrows (Kaitlin), but Helen is the one who told Aryan that if she won HOH, the alliance should control her nominations. Helen loves taking credit for huge moves that Amanda makes, but she hates taking credit for shady moves she makes herself. Personally, I don't find anything wrong with Helen wanting to control Aryan's HOH, but it really chaps her ass that Spencer and others now know about it. Speaking of Amanda, Helen is obsessed with Amanda and McCrae NOT going to Jury together. She doesn't want Amanda voting for McCrae to win over Helen. Again, and totally out of nowhere, Andy says how much he wants Elvira out. Helen automatically nods and mumbles, "Sure, sure." She's totally lying.

Andy then tells Helen that J-U-DD was upset with her yesterday for feeling bad that Howard was crying after nominations. J-U-DD became convinced that Helen would flip and save Howard. Helen nods absently, but she is really still deep in thought over building her ideal Jury. She tells Andy that they have to get rid of Aryan because the longer she stays around, the stronger she makes Amanda and McCrae.

And here is where things gets interesting. Here is where I cleverly reference back to my opening paragraph. For some reason, Helen decides to tell Andy that there are people in the house that think he is floating through the game. Andy asks her who is saying that. Helen tells him J-U-DD and other people. Helen then tells him that people have also said how Andy constantly pops into everyone's conversations. The strained look of hiding pain that flashed across Andy's face in that moment was miraculous. In one split second we caught a glimpse of his entire being crumbling. All the bones and gristle and ginger parts began to buckle, but he quickly snaps out of it and declares, "I'm happy people think I'm a floater. You have to choose when to make a strategic move and now is not my time."

So, yes, Andy is happy to be called a floater. In fact, he's so happy he immediately corners J-U-DD in the Storage Room and tells him how much he loves people thinking he's a floater. Up until this point in time, I think Andy was convinced that he is a hardcore gamer. To hear the word floater attached to himself is freaking him out something fierce. But, Andy is Andy. He'll dust himself off, accept the floater label, and tell everyone it was part of his grand master flash plan all along. Before Andy scurries off to tell more people how much he loves being thought of as a floater, he tells J-U-DD to stay on Candice's good side in case she gets HOH next week.

Outside, we find Helen and Spencer in the hammock talking about Candice. Helen says that Candice isn't helping Howard's game at all. In fact, Candice threatened Helen the other day in the cockpit and Helen just can't let it go. Apparently, Candice was trying to push Helen to make a deal to get her alliance to keep Howard. When Helen didn't respond, Candice told her that if Helen doesn't get her side of the house to save Howard, she'll go after Helen and her friends and take them all down. Helen complains to Spencer how she was surprised and appalled that Candice would threaten her like that. Helen says that she told Candice ok just to get her to shut up. She again tells Spencer how it really ticked her off that something she thought as her friend, Candice, could threaten her and treat her so poorly. Truth be told, Helen threatens people everyday!

The afternoon continued lazily and we now find Helen and Aryan in the hammock. Aryan is upset because all weekend long Candice has been bringing up the race stuff. Aryan apologized to Candice last week for flipping her bed and Candice forgave her. But now that Candice and Howard are in trouble this week, race is all that Candice can talk about. Aryan tells Helen how when she found out that people thought she was racist, she cried so hard that she couldn't breathe. She says she has nightmares about it every night and extremely scared to leave the house because a rumor like that could make her unsafe in the outside world. This is true. And no, I'm not saying Aryan should be completely absolved for what she has said. BUT, I wonder if CBS making Aryan the racist poster girl for the season has indeed put her in danger. Look, we all know she is going to have a miserable time the second she leaves the house. And, believe me, she'll learn a lesson so fast it'll make her head spin. If I think back to all the racist comments made over the season, I find VaGina's (GinaMarie) much more offensive than Aryan's. For the most part, Asshat (Jeremy) and Bouffant (David) have emerged from the scandal unscathed. It strikes me as incredibly unfair that Aryan will be walking into a nightmare. and taking all the blame for every hateful thing ever uttered in that house. Yes, VaGina lost her job too, but I don't think she'll be getting 1/100th of the ire that Aryan has coming her way.

Listening to all of this, Helen admits that she only ever heard Candice and Elvira's side of the story. She tells Aryan that she understands that the comments probably weren't made out of malice, but that sometimes people don't understand how others could be offended by their comments. Helen says this is especially true in a house like Big Brother where all people are looking for is took a comment and twist it something that could get you evicted. Helen tells Aryan that at one point the house was so against Aryan that if she said hello, people would attack for it. The conversation ends with Helen telling Aryan she is glad she has gotten to know her better now.

The day continued fairly uneventfully. We had Andy telling more people how happy he is to be a floater and Aryan organized another nail party in the HOH (to keep Helen happy). That's where I'll end this for today. This afternoon expect Candice to go up in Spencer's place. Will she lose her shit and cry all day? The magic 8 ball says yes.

So, what do you think of Helen playing her game around the Jury? Have you begun to warm up to Aryan at all? Will Andy stop popping into conversations now? (that last one was rhetorical) Comment it out bitches and have a great day!